I forgot where I read this, but towards the end of January I stumbled across it somewhere...
"If the fear of cancer keeps you from moving forward, enjoying life, being with loved ones, laughing...then the cancer won."
If that's the case- then I know my Mom won. My Mom won so big.
I had never seen anything like it. 'It' being the way that she handled all that was thrown at her. Looking back at it now- she had a lot of reasons to slow down, to get discouraged, to be angry, to feel like giving up...and when most people would have reached their breaking point, she never gave in. Her attitude remained upbeat. Her smile remained contagious. Her laughter remained infectious. Her spirit remained inspiring. Her faith kept her going, kept her fighting.
She got out of bed every morning thankful, thankful that she had a job to get up and go to, a job that she loved. Thankful that there were smiling faces of teachers and students waiting for her at this job she loved. After work when most people dreaded going to HEB- she loved it. She loved trying new recipes. She loved coming home and cooking for us. She loved coming home to her family. At night, she sat in 'her chair' watching TV, reading a book, texting her friends, surfing the web on her iPad, and reading a book....YES all at the same time. She was good. She multi-tasked and enjoyed every bit of everything she did. She'd go to bed, more than likely, in pain. Notice that I never once said she complained about anything throughout the day. At most, if she was having a rough day, she would mention something along the lines of "my back is hurting, but I'm sure an ice pack will help me out". That's how she always saw things, "could be worse and I'm going to do whatever I can to make it as 'better' as possible". She went to bed thankful every night. Tired, but thankful, and not without kissing our cheeks or forehead goodnight first. I miss those moments more than anything. Looking back at the moments that I was able to share with her these past few years takes away every bit of embarrassment that being 24 and living at home brought me. I will forever thank God for having my path lead me to being 24 and living at home- because I was able to be with her for that much longer. He is so good.
She made life as normal as possible for her and for her family from the moment she was diagnosed. I will forever be thankful for that. She made the best out of every single moment she had and I pray that I am able to take her attitude and spirit with me every day for the rest of my life and live life more like her as much as possible.
Mom had cancer, but cancer didn't have her.
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